wilful destructions
maybe the stress is reallie getting into me. i actually feel comforted when he toks to me. not relieved that our relationship still allows for verbal exchange but the reassurance and gentle reminder of genuine care still existing in my life. or just existing in general. something all of us are searching for. be it in all the wrong places sometimes.

sometimes we want a change in our life so much tt we allow ourselves to let go of our current life. just to see what would happen when u go off a different track or just fall off the track altogether.

sometimes we tink we can take care of ourselves. and we actually can, so well tt we forget that we need someone to take care of us too. i often convince myself tt i actually dun care, tt it does not matter.. much. but it damn well does matter and i bloody care. i miss her and dun wan nething to happen to her. so much so tt i am beginning to hate him. to despise the fact that his words carry no actions and his love holds no weight. bias and conditional shit it is.