ppl who have oberved my hands will know that i have palms beyond my age. a myriad of deep and fine lines etch into the skin like grapevines. I have always wanted to get my palm read in hope to unlock some mystery in my destiny, maybe i would lead a turbulent life, marrying three times perhaps or get embroiled in some global conspiracy. i can only wish. now and then i would look at my palm earnestly and realize that some of the lines have changed. they always change. an addition of a fine line at the edge, a little divergence on the 'life line', a change in directions here and there.

i discovered an unturned page in my life in the most unlikeliest places the other day. at the risk of sounding cliche, my heart stopped for abit and i was silent. a sudden reminder of a part of space and time that i can try so hard to reach out for now, but will always miss by an inch.

our lives are always changing. one day we may not recognise each other nemore. i wish not to believe in fatalism but determinism. that human action can change the future and altering our past can bring forth a new beginning. yet this sort of belief depresses me. it makes me wish for so many things that i could have done and for so many alternate futures and lives. but time is linear and there is no Eternal Sunshine.